Single on Valentine's Day

Excuse the expected nature of this topic. It's Valentine's Day and I am single, so surely you expected something along these lines. But can I tell you, I'm really happy? That Valentine's Day isn't sending me into a tail-spin of despair and hopelessness? Can I tell you that for the first time in my adult life, I am really okay with being "alone" and unattached? Will you believe me if I say that I really and truly am content with most aspects of my life, without a boyfriend/husband?

Well, I told you. And don't get me wrong - I really do want to be married one day. I love the idea of love.

I just don't feel bad about being single today. Is that weird? If it is, why?

I feel really excited to be able to spend my Valentine's Day with some of my favorite people, to share dinner with my roommate and some friends, to enjoy a sunshiny day with lots of hope and joy because it's isn't snowing.

I've have realized two things: First, that God has made us for marriage, for community, for relationship. Second, it's not the end of the world if you aren't married, so long as you have community and relationship.

Maybe I'm just starting to reflect on the nature of love; I don't feel bad about being single today because I know that I AM loved. I have had some of the best friendships and loving people in my life, in my church, in my family. I know what it is to be loved, even when I don't deserve that warmth of emotion, that openness of heart and home. I have been wrapped in the arms of Love when I was a hateful enemy, "but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." (Romans 5.8)

Love isn't chocolate and roses - though it certainly can be expressed in that form at times. I just don't want chocolate and roses without the sacrificial love that has made me an adopted son of God. I don't want hand holding and kisses unless I also have a heart that seeks the best for the other person, unless my heart is willing to give up my pride and selfishness and self-protection for humility, sacrifice and openness. My expectations are changing.

Maybe that sounds too high-minded? Maybe it is, too. I'll never get there, I'm pretty sure. But I'm just so much more aware of how desperately I'm going to need Jesus in my marriage, in my friendships, in all relationships. I know that I need Jesus, and I know that I have him! So, I'm content in my situation because I know that I have Jesus... I know that he loves me and has brought me into his family. I know that he is making me, along with all of his people, into his spotless bride (Eph. 5:27). I know that though I check the 'single' box for my marital status, I'm not alone. I know that though I mourn not being married, I am still loved. I hope you know that you are loved.