My dad will often remind me that we should hold the gifts of the Lord with open hands, remembering that they are His in the first place and He will do with them as He pleases. Last month I totaled His 2000 Ford Contour and am looking for a new car... and am completely overwhelmed with making a financial decision of that magnitude. Right now, His ministry through me with RUF at Arkansas stands is straddling between no longer existing due to a significant loss of financial support over the last few months and being outrageously blessed as He provides the financial support that is needed to continue into the Spring semester, and should He be willing, into next year. As I look to raise a good deal of money, and cannot see where it might come from, I am holding my hands open, needing to trust that He is a good Father who will provide good things for me, no matter what that might mean, no matter the trial, because I know that He wants good for me and will do good for me (Genesis 12:1-3).
Trials bring temptations, and my temptation is to give up. I'd like to lay down and cry and whine and feel sorry for myself (I've become very good at complaining). Instead of holding my hands open and looking up with expectation, I fall over and form the fetal position. But today, eating lunch with my mother, I was talking about some of the things that had happened this semester with various students, the many ways I had failed them, and the many ways God had faithfully been at work in our lives, and I remembered why I loved the ministry of RUF, why I wanted to be at Arkansas, why I wanted to go back to my students.
I love my students. I love seeing the Word of God pierce their hearts and change them, I love experiencing the same thing myself alongside of them and rejoicing in it. One of the many reasons why I love RUF is because we take seriously the promise that God is going to use His word to bring people to faith in Him. This means that our Large Group will always center around the Word preached, that our small groups will always point back to the Word as it speaks to us even today, that our one-on-ones should always return our focus to the Word of God.
I love sitting in a coffee shop, listening to what God is doing in the life of freshman, sophomore, junior, senior, even if they don't or can't see it at that moment. I love that ministry is personal, that it entails doing the hard work of relationship building. I don't always do a great job of this aspect of my ministry, but I am convinced that meaningful change only happens inside of the context of relationship. Relationship with Jesus Christ, relationship with His church, relationship with His people. Part of why I am on campus is to be that element of relationship that we call discipleship. It's a pushing back to Jesus, back to His word, back to His will, so that we can grow to be more and more like Him. My hope is that in modeling this for my students, they will take this back to their relationships inside of the church, both in their time as college students and far beyond.
I love the University setting. I love the world of ideas and thoughts and the challenge to think beyond yourself. This is a time in life when we look up and see what the world is like, making decisions about who we want to be and where we want to go. These few years of college are ultimately what shape and direct the many major decisions that come in our early twenties. What we believe, what we do, who we spend our life with, the ultimate motivations and morality that we hold, all of these things can become part of us through decisions made in college. This isn't always true for everyone, but it certainly is true for many. It was a time when I wanted someone to bounce ideas off of, to listen and to guide, to push me to grow beyond myself in Christlikeness and others-mindedness. This is one of many reasons why I love the ministry of RUF.
Please, if you are reading this and are able, would you consider partnering with me in the work of the gospel at Arkansas? You can visit www.ruf.org to give or to learn more about our ministry across the country and world on over 120 college campuses.
Wishing you a blessed Christmas,
Heather.
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